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Tynt

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Thru double sided mirror...

To my parents
The adults I want my children to become are the same adults my parents wanted me to be...


I use to think that it was culture "thing", when your parents from birth would already have planned out what your life should/would be, what your area of study should be, who you should marry -not as picking your husband/wife but as being good enough for their "perfect" child-...
I use to look at those kids who could go to public school with so much envy while I had to be in a year round boarding school, I use to not understand why I had curfews, use to not understand why my friends where always judged, not understand why others were always label as bad influence on me even when I knew I was the one...
My parents always seemed to know what was best for me, just as my friends parents knew what was best for their kids so I finally understood, it wasn't a conspiracy against me but a plague all kids had to go thru and I remember I vouched that I would never be that way with my children.

Entering adulthood is when I started to appreciate and understand all the road blocks my parents had built on my early journey in life, for the advises I followed I was now thankful, for the ones I fought against I wished I hadn't. So when I stopped seeing my parents with the eyes of a child, I saw the 2 beautiful beings that helped me give birth to myself... My mother is the most beautiful woman I know and with the help of my father, all I am I owe them. I attribute all my success in life to the moral, intellectual and physical education I received from them as if with parenthood you build an insight, a vision of your child life.

Now as a parent myself, as a loving mother the vision of me and my actions is like looking thru a double sided mirror. The life I once challenged is the same I'm trying to raise my kids in by mimicking my own parents. From the time my kids were conceived, thru birth to now; I truly only have their best interest in heart and this includes knowing what's best for them because I have the wisdom of life  and the baggage that they yet to have.
My aspiration is for them to be the best human beings; my ambition is for them to be successful in all their endeavors, I long for happiness for them...
What kind of parents would we be if we were to not stir them the right way? I have now the power to mold, to shape the kind of adult they will turn out to be -God willing because the outcome is never a guarantee positive- but it would be a disservice if as parents we didn't take advantage of that.
There is no one that would or should know your child better than you, observe , allow them to be their own person by learning their personality, and when you say "no" or tell them "well life is not always fair" do it with love because no matter how hard you would try to explain that you know best...they will never fully accept it nor relate.

Thru the eyes of your child you would read your success or failure as a parent, thru the eyes of my kids I learn to appreciate, understand all the wishes, hopes, aspirations and goals my parents had for me and for that I'll be eternally grateful. My interaction with my kids has such "a deja vu" feeling that I know at the end they will be okay....

Love and let love...
RosieSandz
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