Isn’t that an interesting question? Does it
boil down to maturity? Maturity… what does that mean? If we were discussing a fine wine it would be
one that had rested for ages and was absolutely marvellous to drink. But we’re
clearly not referring to any food or beverage, so what does it mean as it
relates to people? When and how does one acquire maturity? Do we automatically
mature with age? I mean, is there a simple equation to make it all relative?
Perhaps: growing old = age, so age = maturity?
“I am convinced
that most people do not grow up...We marry and dare to have children and call
that growing up. I think what we do is mostly grow old. We carry accumulation
of years in our bodies, and on our faces, but generally our real selves, the
children inside, are innocent and shy as magnolias.”
~Maya Angelou
~Maya Angelou
Today I told one of my staff members, “Regardless of the impact of your actions
or words, the end result was not a (direct or indirect) consequence of your
actions. As a person of integrity, you should be able to stand behind what you
said, feel and believe in. Right is right and the reflection in the mirror will
and should tell you so.”
But
while I said these words, I forgot that maturity - or the lack thereof - is not
a matter of age (acquired with years) but a matter of ageless wisdom… Yes, maturity
is a combination of sensibility, experience, emotions, subtlety and wisdom.....
Early on, we go through life wishing for
the years to come faster than the days in them. We can’t wait until we reach
that special age; whether it’s the
day we turn 18, 21, 30, or whatever. It
can certainly vary culture to culture and person to person. We are simply hoping
that the accumulation of years will give us freedom, free will, wisdom, and autonomy
- which in many of our minds, can translate to being mature, or ready. What
many don’t realize is that being of age,
doesn’t mean that you are of stage.
You can be a 67 year old, grey-haired man with the intellectual prowess of a 12
year old. Likewise, you can be a 12 year old, fresh out of junior high school,
and posses the smarts and will-power to impact a generation. The stage you are
in, as it relates to your life, doesn’t always coordinate with the age you are
in.
So to answer my own question; growing older
isn’t really a matter of choice. It is not a part of the “options list” we get
to choose from in our lives. We can get as many plastic surgeries, Botox
injections, and lipo as we can afford, but when Father Time comes knocking, you
must answer. As sure as there is a sun and moon, we will all get old… Sorry to
be the bearer of bad news. On the other hand, growing up is an option as it is totally different to growing
older. Growing up has more to do with your decision to put away childish
things. And nobody can convince you to do so; you have to realize that your
life requires a more thoughtful, insightful, unselfish, focused and determined
you! When you come to this conclusion, you’ll already have crossed into the
first stages of maturity.
Life is what you make of it at any age, or
whatever happens (good, bad or indifferent) in your life. Just remember that you
can't stop from growing older; that's just a part of life. Remember that every
day is a gift, so you need to live it and enjoy it to the fullest. Old in years
or not, the maturity that you will acquire throughout the years will make your
life more appreciable. In growing older, you go through experiences,
situations, challenges, and events that will cause you to adapt, readjust your
frame of mind and adhere to different entities you weren’t accustomed to. The
way you cope with novelty determines your level of maturity
That
thing called maturity…
Maturity is a state of mind, and a state of
awareness that has nothing to do with age. Maturity is realizing that the world
doesn’t revolve around our being. Maturity is acknowledging others, validating
their opinions and points of view, while being able to admit when you are wrong
and be humble enough when you are right. How we become mature is connected to
how we were brought up and how we reacted to our environment and coped with it.
Additionally, we can be mature about some things and immature about others.
Maturity isn't something that comes all at once and generalizes to everything
in our life.
Maturity is consistently assuming full
responsibility of your choices, actions, and behaviours - while recognizing
that it does affect not only your life but also those around you. Growing and
reaching emotional maturity is reaching a level of perspicacity that regardless
of what life throws at you, you can’t reach while being young. But hear me
well, age DOES NOT GUARANTEE MATURITY. Growing old doesn’t equal growing up. I’ve
said that a few times throughout this blog, but I really want that to sink in a
bit. I can’t possibly stress that enough, as it seems people have it completely
backwards. There are loads of immature adults out there, just as much as there
are tons of mature young adults. However, the expectation is that with age we
grow up and gain maturity (I guess another myth easily proven wrong!).
So I guess it all boils down to us. What
type of person do we want to be? Do we want to do like the song, and be
“Forever Young,” or maybe do like the Toys R Us commercial suggests and, “Never
grow up, because we’re Toy’s R Us kids?” Or maybe we want to age like the fine
wine I mentioned, and just become better and wiser with time. And we also have
to consider that there might be people counting on us to reach our full
potential, or maturity. Maybe there are problems out there that we are supposed
to solve, but won’t until we fully mature? And until we do, there we will
always be anticipation. So let’s get the ball rolling! And it’s perfectly okay
to let the process happen, in the same way that I wouldn’t expect to see a 3
year old driving a car. Time cannot dictate when we mature, but rest assured,
you will learn some things over time. So let time work to your advantage,
rather than against. Let time help you become mature.
“The greatest day in your life and mine is
when we take total responsibility for our attitudes. That's the day we truly
grow up.”
― John C. Maxwell
― John C. Maxwell
Be someone that makes you happy. Act the
age you want to act…with a background of maturity.
RosieSandz
