“There are
moments in our lives when we summon the courage to make choices that go against
reason, against common sense and the wise counsel of people we trust. But we
lean forward nonetheless because, despite all risks and rational argument, we
believe that the path we are choosing is the right and best thing to do. We
refuse to be bystanders, even if we do not know exactly where our actions will
lead.”
~Howard Schultz,
CEO Starbucks
Much to my chagrin, I have not updated my
blog for the past few weeks. While I made it a personal promise to be consistent with the writing schedule I had
laid out for “Rosiesandz: My Life Lessons,” the recent changes in my life
really threw everything upside down… My last Sunday quote of the week was a
reflection of what my life is now…“Even
the best plan planned is never without surprise; when your "wish" becomes reality, be ready to work harder to make it a dream come true...”~Rose Sanderson
Just to bring you up to speed on the recent
happenings in my world - I finally got the promotion I was looking for. It has
brought on a change in my work routine, change in the responsibilities that
give purpose to my work day and added weight on my decisions that truly matter…
And while I am very excited and love the opportunity to overcome this new
challenge in my life, I’m still adjusting to the new normal; the new changes to my daily responsibilities… in my
family life.
The other day I came across this
inspirational story of a hardworking man, and while this story is about a man,
it can easily be my story:
Father
was a hardworking man who delivered bread for a living to support his wife and
three children. He spent all his evenings after work attending classes, hoping
to improve himself so that he could one day find a better paying job. Except
for Sundays, Father hardly ate a meal together with his family. He worked and
studied very hard because he wanted to provide his family with the best money
could buy.
Whenever
the family complained that he was not spending enough time with them, he
reasoned that he was doing all this for them. But he often yearned to spend
more time with his family.
The
day came when the examination results were announced. To his joy, Father
passed, and with distinctions too! Soon after, he was offered a good job as a
senior supervisor which paid handsomely.
Like
a dream come true, Father could now afford to provide his family with life’s
little luxuries like nice clothing, fine food and vacations abroad.
However,
the family still did not get to see father for most of the week. He continued
to work very hard, hoping to be promoted to the position of manager. In fact,
to make himself a worthily candidate for the promotion, he enrolled for another
course in the Open University.
Again,
whenever the family complained that he was not spending enough time with them,
he reasoned that he was doing all this for them. But he often yearned to spend
more time with his family.
Father’s
hard work paid off and he was promoted. Jubilantly, he decided to hire a maid
to relieve his wife from her domestic tasks. He also felt that their three-room
flat was no longer big enough; it would be nice for his family to be able to
enjoy the facilities and comfort of a condominium. Having experienced the
rewards of his hard work many times before, Father resolved to further his
studies and work at being promoted again. The family still did not get to see
much of him. In fact, sometimes Father had to work on Sundays entertaining
clients. Again, whenever the family complained that he was not spending enough
time with them, he reasoned that he was doing all this for them. But he often
yearned to spend more time with his family.
As
expected, Father’s hard work paid off again and he bought a beautiful
condominium overlooking the coast of Singapore. On the first Sunday evening at
their new home, Father declared to his family that he decided not to take
anymore courses or pursue any more promotions. From then on he was going to
devote more time to his family.
Father
did not wake up the next day…
I will never be a stay-at-home mom; not
only for financial reasons but mostly because of the person that I am. I need
to be challenged - I need the intellectual gratification you get from being a part
of a working environment and being stimulated by and with adults.
However, I do understand that desires can
be unlimited. I have to decide the level of goals I want to pursue; what level
of comfort and luxury I want for my family and I.
Somehow as we grow older, we get caught up
in the monotonicity of “making a living,” pursuing aspirations after
aspirations. And sometimes, sub-consciously, the things that should be
priorities and the ones that shouldn’t become blurry and you create a life for
yourself were it all seems balanced and working well. Gradually, we lose sight
and connectivity with why we started having the dreams in the first place. We
eventually can’t remember why we worked so hard to achieve the goals, and we make
the dreams and aspirations our priority.
Our purpose in life is a life of purpose and a life of purpose can only be a life
dedicated to someone else (family, a cause, etc.). Our purpose should never be
self-governed, self-indulgent, or self-serving. To know that despite the fact that
we may make mistakes along the way, when we look back on where we have been, we
will be able to see just how far we have come when the happiness of the ones
around us has not been negatively impacted.
This is what I took away from the story
above, my lesson(s) learned:
Whatever we do (and aspire to do for our
lives); there must be a definite, clear level of contentment to stick to and
not overlook. It’s true that wishes never end. While completing our list of
wishes one by one, we must not forget that our loved ones and family also wish upon
us. You must allow them the time they seek, to fulfill their desires.
We are not promised a “tomorrow,” but tomorrow
is what we hold in hope, tomorrow is what we hope our dreams will translate to.
It is the better future we want to see unfold for our love ones. And you can’t
hope for tomorrow if you won’t be a participant. Be ambitious, have
aspirations, work for better tomorrow BUT the best way to fulfill ambition, to
have life doubled, joy multiplied, to have no regrets, to have it all is to
remember who it is all for and what is most important for them… and that is
you!
