Monday, August 5, 2013

Am I Here To Live While At Work, or Here To Work while I’m Alive?

“There are moments in our lives when we summon the courage to make choices that go against reason, against common sense and the wise counsel of people we trust. But we lean forward nonetheless because, despite all risks and rational argument, we believe that the path we are choosing is the right and best thing to do. We refuse to be bystanders, even if we do not know exactly where our actions will lead.”
~Howard Schultz, CEO Starbucks

Much to my chagrin, I have not updated my blog for the past few weeks. While I made it a personal promise to be consistent with the writing schedule I had laid out for “Rosiesandz: My Life Lessons,” the recent changes in my life really threw everything upside down… My last Sunday quote of the week was a reflection of what my life is now…“Even the best plan planned is never without surprise; when your "wish" becomes reality, be ready to work harder to make it a dream come true...”~Rose Sanderson

Just to bring you up to speed on the recent happenings in my world - I finally got the promotion I was looking for. It has brought on a change in my work routine, change in the responsibilities that give purpose to my work day and added weight on my decisions that truly matter… And while I am very excited and love the opportunity to overcome this new challenge in my life, I’m still adjusting to the new normal; the new changes to my daily responsibilities… in my family life.

The other day I came across this inspirational story of a hardworking man, and while this story is about a man, it can easily be my story:

Father was a hardworking man who delivered bread for a living to support his wife and three children. He spent all his evenings after work attending classes, hoping to improve himself so that he could one day find a better paying job. Except for Sundays, Father hardly ate a meal together with his family. He worked and studied very hard because he wanted to provide his family with the best money could buy.

Whenever the family complained that he was not spending enough time with them, he reasoned that he was doing all this for them. But he often yearned to spend more time with his family.

The day came when the examination results were announced. To his joy, Father passed, and with distinctions too! Soon after, he was offered a good job as a senior supervisor which paid handsomely.

Like a dream come true, Father could now afford to provide his family with life’s little luxuries like nice clothing, fine food and vacations abroad.

However, the family still did not get to see father for most of the week. He continued to work very hard, hoping to be promoted to the position of manager. In fact, to make himself a worthily candidate for the promotion, he enrolled for another course in the Open University.

Again, whenever the family complained that he was not spending enough time with them, he reasoned that he was doing all this for them. But he often yearned to spend more time with his family.

Father’s hard work paid off and he was promoted. Jubilantly, he decided to hire a maid to relieve his wife from her domestic tasks. He also felt that their three-room flat was no longer big enough; it would be nice for his family to be able to enjoy the facilities and comfort of a condominium. Having experienced the rewards of his hard work many times before, Father resolved to further his studies and work at being promoted again. The family still did not get to see much of him. In fact, sometimes Father had to work on Sundays entertaining clients. Again, whenever the family complained that he was not spending enough time with them, he reasoned that he was doing all this for them. But he often yearned to spend more time with his family.

As expected, Father’s hard work paid off again and he bought a beautiful condominium overlooking the coast of Singapore. On the first Sunday evening at their new home, Father declared to his family that he decided not to take anymore courses or pursue any more promotions. From then on he was going to devote more time to his family.

Father did not wake up the next day…

I will never be a stay-at-home mom; not only for financial reasons but mostly because of the person that I am. I need to be challenged - I need the intellectual gratification you get from being a part of a working environment and being stimulated by and with adults.

However, I do understand that desires can be unlimited. I have to decide the level of goals I want to pursue; what level of comfort and luxury I want for my family and I.
Somehow as we grow older, we get caught up in the monotonicity of “making a living,” pursuing aspirations after aspirations. And sometimes, sub-consciously, the things that should be priorities and the ones that shouldn’t become blurry and you create a life for yourself were it all seems balanced and working well. Gradually, we lose sight and connectivity with why we started having the dreams in the first place. We eventually can’t remember why we worked so hard to achieve the goals, and we make the dreams and aspirations our priority.

Our purpose in life is a life of purpose and a life of purpose can only be a life dedicated to someone else (family, a cause, etc.). Our purpose should never be self-governed, self-indulgent, or self-serving. To know that despite the fact that we may make mistakes along the way, when we look back on where we have been, we will be able to see just how far we have come when the happiness of the ones around us has not been negatively impacted.

This is what I took away from the story above, my lesson(s) learned:
Whatever we do (and aspire to do for our lives); there must be a definite, clear level of contentment to stick to and not overlook. It’s true that wishes never end. While completing our list of wishes one by one, we must not forget that our loved ones and family also wish upon us. You must allow them the time they seek, to fulfill their desires.

We are not promised a “tomorrow,” but tomorrow is what we hold in hope, tomorrow is what we hope our dreams will translate to. It is the better future we want to see unfold for our love ones. And you can’t hope for tomorrow if you won’t be a participant. Be ambitious, have aspirations, work for better tomorrow BUT the best way to fulfill ambition, to have life doubled, joy multiplied, to have no regrets, to have it all is to remember who it is all for and what is most important for them… and that is you!


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